I Know I Shouldn't...

I'm back in NZ after my whirlwind trip back to the US for the holidays and to help out my family after my dad's cancer diagnosis and other health problems. I haven't told anyone that I'm back.

Not even work.

Back when I didn't have a ticket yet, I told my boss that I'd be back at work by next week.

But I came back early. And I guess have decided to take this time to myself. Despite being away from work for 3 of the past 4 months, I just can't face going back right away.

Last year, I worked myself non stop January to mid-September, preparing for a conference in the beginning of Sept. I had a week and a half of whirlwind travel around Italia (yay) and then went home to the US to help out my parents. My dad was so sick that I ended up staying an extra month at home (while getting all of my work done from the US, of course). I came back to NZ in mid-November to find new flatmates and get some of my PhD labwork done, and then went back to the US to help out my family again over the holidays. I have just returned back to NZ for the foreseeable future, which involves an intense stretch of PhD work over the next few months to a year.

I am...exhausted.

I know I have buttloads of PhD labwork and other work to get started on, and I know I should be working, and shouldn't take even more time off than I have already, but I ...am anyway.

I'm sorry, work. I'm sorry, future self who will undoubtedly be making up for me slacking this week.

Instead, I've taken this time to focus on myself. Practicing my Duolingo Spanish, stretching every day, doing my Down Dog yoga app and a few body weight exercises, cooking healthy meals, meditating, wasting time on frivolous TV shows, cleaning up my credit report, using my new posture trainer, planning my days, getting massages, pedicures, waxes/tints, and haircuts, taking long baths, reading books, skyping friends, gardening, and going to free concerts by the NZ opera sponsored by Auckland Council (that was really wonderful, by the way!), amongst other cleaning-house, laundry, organisational chores and unstructured leisure time activities.

It is utter and complete bliss. A glorious mixture of selfish unstructured and indulgent me time + responsible adult self care time and long-term rewarding activities. As much as I love my job and the sense of purpose and accomplishment and structure it gives me, it's too much sometimes. Coupled with taking care of my family so intensely (even if dad is doing much better!), it becomes unbearable.

I guess this is the vacation away from my vacation. On the docket for the rest of this week:

• a much needed haircut
• a bike ride on Auckland's 'new' bike trails (they opened several years ago, I just haven't had time to enjoy them yet)
• walks in the sunshine
• some shopping
• house cleaning
• meal planning and cooking
• catching up on my favorite podcasts
• lots of exercises
• another massage
• more gardening
• a look into social exercise classes/research into options
• more espanol!
• a continuation of my healthy sleep schedule
• reading on the beach
• maybe paddleboarding
• drinks with friends in the sunshine (after I start telling people I'm back; maybe Friday afternoon? :))

This is the life.

2019 Budget

After reviewing my spending and expected income for 2019, I've made some adjustments to my 2018 budget going forward. I seem to have a little bit more wiggle room in my budget for this year.

	2019 Budget
Category	Budgeted Amount	Per Month
Rent	$12,220.00	$1,018.33
Groceries	$5,700.00	$475.00
Internet	$1,100.00	$91.67
Electricity	$0.00	$0.00
Eating Out	$1,968.00	$164.00
Charity	$600.00	$50.00
Cell phone	$350.00	$29.17
Medical	$1,400.00	$116.67
Misc	$9,600.00	$800.00
Savings	$6,600.00	$550.00
Total	$39,538.00	$3,294.83

I expect to make $35,901 NZD from my salaries next year. I expect to rake in $3,640 from renting out my parking space, for a total of $39,541.While the majority of my income is accounted for here, I do not expect that I will spend all of it every month. The monthly overages will be put toward my various short- and medium-term funds:

• 2020 US trip ($3K)
• DSLR camera ($1K)
• PhD Slush Fund (always being funded/used towards therapy; massages; exercise; anything that helps me maintain my mental and physical well being. Approx $1500 limit at any one time) 

Here's to a great year!!

2018 Spending Review & 2019 Budget

2018, in numbers.

Income from work and PhD salaries and garage rent in 2018: $41,505

Spending in 2018: $30,115

This does NOT count monthly savings ($500/mo), all travel spending, money given to me, and times where I saved up funds in other years, and then spent them this year. All that is just too hard to track, particularly because when I am on vacation and spending the night in a different place every night, the last thing I want to do is track my spending. I LIVE for my travel and don't let any work get in the way. :)

2018 Spending

Category	Spent	Per Month	Budgeted Amount	Balance	% spent
Rent	$12,255.00	$1,021.25	$11,700.00	-$555.00	1.0474
Groceries	$5,453.84	$454.49	$5,100.00	-$353.84	1.0694
Internet	$289.63	$24.14	$315.96	$26.33	0.9167
Electricity	$472.42	$39.37	$600.00	$127.58	0.7874
Eating Out	$1,841.53	$153.46	$1,716.00	-$125.53	1.0732
Charity	$460.00	$38.33	$360.00	-$100.00	1.2778
Cell phone	$260.49	$21.71	$480.00	$219.51	0.5427
Medical	$635.00	$52.92	$780.00	$145.00	0.8141
Misc	$8,447.71	$703.98	$8,400.00	-$47.70	1.0057
Savings	$6,000.00	$500.00	$6,000.00	$0.00	1
Total	$36,115.62	$3,009.63	$35,451.96	-$663.66

RENT: $12,255. Over budget, I had several weeks without flatmates and had to carry the rent myself. Things should be back on track in 2019. 

GROCERIES: $5,453: Over budget slightly. I increased the grocery budget mid-year, and slightly again for 2019.


INTERNET: $289: On target because I combined internet and electricity towards the end of the year.

ELECTRICITY: $472: Electricity seems to be under budget. 2019 might be over budget--I'm with a new company that combines internet and electricity so I am not sure yet what the costs will be like.


EATING OUT: $1,841: Slightly overbudget. Have made adjustments for 2019.

CHARITY: $460: Underbudget. I will aim to do better in 2019.

CELL PHONE: $260:  Under budget but this doesn't give the full picture, as I used roaming on my NZ SIM while in the US and Italy for 2.5 months, and used my travel funds to cover that cost.


MEDICAL: $635:  Under budget, but I think I made some reporting errors here. For 2019, I need to cover:

• 2 dental appointments
• at least 1 general check up for routine blood and lady-medical examinations
• 1 eye appointment
• monthly therapy appointments
• possibly a weekly physio appointment
• possibly a dermatology appointment

MISC: $8,448: Pretty much on the money (ha!).

It breaks down as follows:

alcohol: $120
entertainment: $156.20
exercise: (not tracked, counted towards other categories)
fees: $83.31
gifts: $348.54
goods and wants: $2,763.84
transportation: $1,682.86
travel: $4,386.34

SAVINGS: $6,000:  Exactly. This is automated. Monthly overages get split between all of my active short-term funds. This system is working well--I'm saving towards a house and everything else that I want.

I contribute the max of 8% salary to my Kiwisaver for retirement currently; that isn't counted in any of my savings tallies on this blog (but is included in my Net Worth posts).

2019 won't change much; my income has increased slightly and this will result in several categories getting a bump. :) Stay tuned!!

2019 Goals

Over the past few years, I've made and completed some important goals. There is one that still looms large: going to bed at a reasonable hour for a 'normal' life. I also need to make movement a part of my daily life.

I am 40 and it is way past time to tackle these issues, which increasingly are causing problems in my life. Because I am too tired and on a weird schedule, I've started to miss important meetings and declined fun activities that I'd normally be psyched about. I am just so tired all of the time...

Maybe exercise would help? But I don't make time or the effort to do that, either. My 40 year old body has started to break down because I don't take care of it. I have started to get aches and pains and I'm afraid they are chronic now, and that the damage has been done. I get massages every week now, and the same exact spots are sore and stiff. I would like to see if practicing having good posture, moving my body more, and stretching would alleviate some of the pain?

So, as for the past 10+ years, my goals are to:
1. exercise daily
2. get on a more 'normal' sleep schedule


Financial Goals

1. Review 5, 10, and 20 year financial goals and make sure I'm on track to achieve these. My dad's illness threw a wrench in the works and my savings took a big hit.
2. Revise 2019 budget, taking into account my 2018 budget failures and successes, and #1, above.
3. Review my NZ retirement allocations.
4. Review my US retirement allocations.
5. Review insurances, will, and Master Financial documents.
6. Get the above in a specific place that only my trusted loved ones know how to find in case of an emergency.
7. File US taxes.
8. File state taxes.
9. File FBAR.
10. File NZ taxes. 
11. Renew basic Renter's insurance (including public liability). In 2019, it was $358.42 for $12K with $1K excess. 
12. Renew disability insurance. I cancelled this.
    
13. When I am in the US in Sept/Oct, check Experian and Equifax credit reports from the US. Check TransUnion after October 13. Continue to check in on my scores quarterly via CreditKarma. (Note for future years: Equifax made me call in: 877-322-8228 to order my report--they refused me online.)
14. Remove/dispute sister's authorized user cc entry from all 3 credit reports. TransUnion, Experian, Equifax.
15. Use airpoints for US trip in 2019. ETA: used miles for half of my flights.
16. Apply for cc's strategically: see here. 
17. Save $500/mo to long-term House DP goal.
18. Put overages toward short term goals like my PhD Fun Fund, new laptop, new phone, and a DSLR.
19. Track every penny and stay out of debt.
20. Track peer to peer lending and contribute more $$ to high risk loans to maximize interest profits.

Travel/Experiences/Social

1.  Go to a meetup or other event/class where I know no one. 
2. Do Coast-to-Coast hike. I'm thinking via e-bike if I can get my hands on one.
3. Test drive an e-bike.
4. Visit family in US.
5. Research/fantasize future trips: e.g. Cook Islands, Iceland, river cruise through Europe with my mom and aunt.
6. Visit the Stardome.
7.  Find something fun and social to do for Xmas and New Year's Eve 2019.

Learning/Projects

1. Explore new hobbies. Invite interested friends to try particular classes: pole dancing, hip hop, other dance, etc.
2. Learn the constellations. Nah. I'm never doing this.
3. Practice Spanish as often as possible. June update: so far, I do a lesson in DuoLingo almost every day
4. Create a regular practice of doing splits/stretch/yoga. 
5. Create a regular practice of meditating.

Career

1. Update my CV, LinkedIn, Twitter, blog, staff page, and Researchgate profiles for work in July and December.
2. Get colleagues/friends to check ease of use and professionalism of career blog/website.
3.  Apply for one grant or award.
4.  Give one public outreach talk. 
5.  Present a research talk. 
6.  Submit first paper for PhD.
7. Notice when I am being exceptionally harsh on myself and use my compassionate, kind voice instead of my self-critical voice.
8. Practice self-care (therapy, self discipline, etc.).

Medical/Physical/Mental Health

1. Re-write my Foodist Kitchen 30 Day Challenge into one for Exercise.
2. Re-write my Foodist Kitchen 30 Day Challenge into one for Sleep.
3. Use Leechblock to slowly move my bedtimes earlier.  
4. Track my time. 
5. After sleep schedule is sorted, track my time and moods, ID inefficiencies, and schedule my days optimally.
6. Do weekly meal planning. Try getting groceries delivered/compare costs. June update: I now do a mix of grocery pick up when I have the car and grocery delivery when I don't.
7. Take time to organise my week/month every weekend.
8. Floss every day.
9. Get normal yearly check up: +thyroid levels. 
10. eye appts: july, august, nov
11. Get flu shot.
12. Get dental check up.  June
13. Get dermatology appointment
14. Meditate a few minutes every day. I like the free 'Let's Meditate' app at the moment. Also, I bought myself a HeadSpace account for 2019.  
15. Treat yo'self! Right now, my favorite treat is a weekly massage.
16. Find new physio?
17. Try out new posture corrector. Update Feb: I can't tell if it is working. I'll continue to use it an hour a day, though.
18. Set reminders on work computer to move around more during the work day/take breaks. 
19. Continue seeing therapist at least once a month. Change up focus from PhD to other issues (social/interpersonal relationships & microresolutions, see below).
20. Try a shorter version of an elimination diet like Whole30 or Perfect Diet. 

Other

1. Back up home computer and Surface Pro several times a year: January/May. Got new laptop and transferred files using a 750 GB external hard drive in September--so my main laptop is backed up in the US now. I have two 1 TB external HDs for NZ and the US now.
2. Test that google back up goodsync is working to back up my google drive at work.
3. Identify pieces I want for my ideal wardrobe:
1. Right now I'm obsessed with finding a silver sequin jacket
4. Work on ancestry book for both sides of family. 
5. Treat eczema, avoid twirling my hair (I think I'm going bald in one spot!).