Making Goals: Staying Alive Until 2023

Sure, everything is still a mess, but let's pull together a few goals, with the main one just being surviving until 2023 😂 Just surviving has been my goal for the past few years, honestly.

First up, Health:

1. Make a plan to exercise remotely every day, with the goal of it actually happening at least 3x a week.
2. Plan meals weekly, grocery shop, and cook for the week.
3. Dr appointments -
   
1. Physio: 
1. shoulder
2. posture
3. weekly massage
   
2. 2022 Optometry appt - reading glasses prescription, dry eyes treatment
1. order new glasses
   
3. 2022 Flu shot
4. 2022 women's health check up
5. Blood test every 3 months for hypothyroid:
1. May 2022
   
2. August 2022
   
3. November 2022
6. 2022 Dentist
   
1. May check up
2. Nov check up
   
3. Floss every day
4. Use new electronic toothbrush every day
7. ADHD/Therapy
1. Psychiatrist appt: July 2022
2. Therapy: every 4 weeks
8. Go to dermatologist.
1. Mole map, treat anything suspicious
   
2. Treat eczema 
9. Try to meditate to fall asleep every day, with the goal of it actually happening at least 3x a week.

 Finances

1. Keep track of spending.
1. Update net worth every month
2. Track peer to peer lending.
   
3. Finish saving $10K for post-PhD fund. 
   
4. File US taxes.
5. File state taxes.
6. File FBAR.
7. File/check NZ taxes (June).
8. When I am in the US in Sept, check Experian and Equifax credit reports from the US. 
1. Continue to check in on my scores quarterly via CreditKarma. (Note for future years: Equifax made me call in: 877-322-8228 to order my report--they refused me online.)
9. Renew 2022 renter's insurance.
   
10. Keep track of airpoints for travel.
    
11. Apply for cc's strategically: see here.
12. Stay out of debt.

Career/Productivity

1. Make time to organise my meals, social, work, exercise, and mental health every weekend.
2. Make one small step towards PhD every workday - try to keep to the PhD planning schedule that my supervisor and I drew up.
   
3.  Notice when I am being exceptionally harsh on myself and use my compassionate, kind voice instead of my self-critical voice.
4. Try new productivity techniques as recommended by my therapist:
1. break down daily to-dos and big projects into very tiny steps. Practice getting things done & noticing when I'm starting to get off-track.
2. Relate my actions to my stated values.
   
3. Investigate break reminders and how to get myself to take breaks and go back to work afterward.
4. Celebrate tiny 'wins.'
5. Track progress to be held accountable. 
   

Travel/Experiences/Social

1. See friends at least once a week.
2. Talk to family once a week. 
3. Travel to US in August 2022. Make plans to see family & friends: 
1. B
2. H
   
3. N/J/A?
4. local aunt and cousins
5. mom's side of family in northern California for wedding:
1. decide timing with family and book flights
2. book house
3. book car
4. Research/fantasize about future trips when I need a pick me up: e.g. Cook Islands, Hawaii, Iceland, England, river cruise through Europe with my mom and aunt.
5. Find something fun and social to do for Xmas 2022 and New Year's Eve 2022-3. Northland trip/break? 

Other

1. Back up personal laptop computer several times a year: January/June/December.
2. Back up personal laptop when at home in September.
   
3. Move all work files to DropBox.
4. Get new desktop computer at work. Update April 2022: on back order.
   
5. Make automated ISO of work HD twice a year (March, November).

Is This Pandemic PTSD?

Heyo, anyone who still checks in on this blog! Who else is feeling like they may have developed some symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder during this pandemic? Raise your hand...

Well, you are not alone. According to the Mayo Clinic, PTSD can cause: 

• problems socially, mentally, and in your relationships
• inability to do normal daily tasks
• stressful dreams or nightmares, and intense reactions to normal situations that trigger you
• avoidance of certain situations or places
• negative thoughts about yourself, other people, or the world
• hopelessness about the future
• memory issues, detachment from family and friends
• lack of interest in old hobbies
• difficulty in feeling positive emotions
• emotional numbness
• feelings of being 'on guard' or easily frightened
• trouble sleeping and concentrating
• and more
  

If a pandemic wasn't tailor-made to cause PTSD, I don't know what would!! Honestly, every single symptom of PTSD is something we've had to purposely inflict on ourselves, try to process, and make 'normal' to us, down to avoiding our loved ones and being 'on guard for danger' all of the time. And that doesn't even count the scourge of dealing with Q-Anon anti-vaxxers... I am getting teary-eyed for the whole world just thinking about everything we've gone through. I'm so sorry.

Between living in NZ, being relatively healthy and young-ish, and being able to keep my job, work from home, I've had a somewhat 'cushy' version of the pandemic life. And even then, I'm a total mess. For goodness' sake, I still have my 2020 goals list up on the right side bar -->

I wrote that at the end of 2019, when covid was but a whisper, at least outside of China. Now, over two years later, I feel utterly destroyed, but can more plainly see the waste that the pandemic has made to my health, life, and the world. I know it's not even over yet, but somehow, with my flatmate getting covid (oh yeah -- that happened!), my sister getting covid (that *also* happened), and having 5 days off for Easter (yay!), I think I am starting to think about life beyond the here and now. For so long, I feel like our lives have revolved around reacting to immediate things happening to us in the present, and my brain has started -- juuuust started -- to adjust to that reality, and make it normal. To make that unpredictability normal, we have all been through so much stress, worry, strife, death, and other horrible things. I really believe we are all traumatized, and that this experience will change most of us forever, in ways we don't even realize yet. I was joking with a friend that we're going to be similar to our grannies and grandpas who lived through the war and do things like save and wash aluminum foil and plastic baggies -- instead, we are going to be obsessed with hand sanitizer, freak out internally and move away from anyone who sneezes or coughs near us, and always keep a spare pack of toilet paper in the cupboards. Or is that just me??? 😂

Anyway, my point is that I think I have started to come to a place where I can think about the future and start to get back to taking care of my long-term health. In the past 4 months, I've:

• gotten minor surgery to assess/remove some dermatological issues (benign!)
• gone to a psychiatrist to get assessed for ADHD (I have it)
• started taking ADHD medication (it's helping!)
  
• gotten my normal gyno check up (clear!)
  

In the last 2 weeks I've:

• started going to a therapist for my ADHD issues
• paid for a remote gym membership - I'm not ready for in-person yet...
• started putting virtual workout classes up on my TV and following along 
• started going to the physio and getting short back massages again (masked)
• started seeing friends in person (at my house or other people's houses, or outside only)
• gathered people from more than one household at my house for a social activity
  
  

We'll see how I go, but that is a LOT more than I've done for my health in the past 2 years...maybe I'll do a goal update if I keep feeling more capable of *life.* 

I wonder how you think the pandemic has affected you, and if you think you have started to adjust to this new way of living, where everything is constantly changing and new challenges keep getting thrown at us??