Life Update: Changes & Heart Attacks

This month's theme is: Therapy Fodder!

Some changes and upsetting personal news are causing me to spiral a little.

1. my aunt had a severe heart attack and had to have triple bypass surgery this past week
2. one of my most supportive colleagues died suddenly
3. my sister is not doing well--she is having major delusions and hallucinations
4. my flatmates announced they are leaving in 2 weeks, after 3.5 years
5. both my job and PhD have MAJOR deadlines in the next 2-3 weeks
6. I've had a sinus or other kind of infection for 2+ weeks. I keep getting better and then doing too much and backsliding a little.
7. I can't seem to manage my sleep cycle. I am sleeping WAY too much (probably related to winter-time, being upset/stressed about the above, and my infection).
8. the only 2 NZ friends I ever hang out with anymore are away on vacation, so I don't have anyone to talk to here

I don't know how I'm going to get through the next 3-4 weeks, especially given that my sleep patterns are so OFF and I seem to need to sleep between 11 am and 4 pm every day in order to get out of bed at all, no matter if I've gotten a full nights' rest the night before. I manage about ONE really productive, full day of work OR 2-3 hours/day of light work a week, but then I'm useless the rest of the time.

So anyway, I have a lot to talk about in therapy tomorrow! Mostly about being alone, getting older, and dealing with change and stress. I don't seem to adapt to it very well.

[ETA, end July 2018:

1. My aunt ended up back in the hospital after the catheter gave her a UTI. [THANKS, DIRTY HOSPITALS). She is resting at home and recovering now, but things are very stressful re: money at their house because she was the main breadwinner for her, her husband, her two grown children, one of their spouses, and her 1 year old grandchild. I wish someone from her immediate family (her husband mainly, who refuses to get a job?) would pitch in a bit more. My family is doing what they can, and I have offered to set up a food delivery but they haven't taken me up on it yet. I CANNOT imagine...
2. I cried in therapy about the death of my colleague. We worked out it was because he was just so kind and lovely and endlessly caring and giving to our community on every single level--someone I look up to and want to be like--and he died alone and young-ish, without fulfilling the (completely unself-serving) goals he had. I think it is SO UNFAIR that the most wonderful people on Earth don't get the lives and love and care they deserve while SOME PEOPLE are complete selfish, awful a-holes and get to be in charge of a whole country. Ahem. Also, I think I see a little of myself in him (or at least I want to see myself in him) and I don't want to die that way, alone and without fulfilling what I have set out to do in the world. It still upsets me SO MUCH, that first reason. Why why why are horrible people so rewarded in our society? It infuriates me to no end.
3. My sis moved from an independent apartment place, back to a group home again. She keeps getting back together and breaking up with her 'fiance.' So, she isn't better, but she recognized that she needed more supervision than she was getting at her apartment, and made the switch. I am proud of her.
4. I found new, albeit temporary flatmates. They are two 22 year old girls, sharing a queen bed. Believe me, they were my last pick due to the age difference and the fact that they only plan to stay for 5 months (sigh). After about 15 inquiries, I made 10 appointments to show my place. Just 3 showed up, and they were they ONLY 2-person application that I received. In order to afford my place, I really need to rent to TWO people and split the rent and utilities amongst three people.

Is this fair? Rent is $575 per week, they pay $350. I pay $225. They have their own balcony, a private bathroom (toilet/sink), and a bigger room and closets.
5. I got through my deadlines, but some of it is on-going and my supervisor, OF COURSE, was a jerk to me on our trip overseas to collect data. OF COURSE. He blatantly told me, while I was doing a very sensitive, fragile procedure, that he didn't trust my judgment on anything having to do with my PhD. I pulled 4 all nighters to get my analyses done and when we reached the airport, he didn't mention all the effort that I'd put in, just started talking about starting the next big project (nevermind that I'm in the middle of THREE projects ALREADY).
6. I still cough a tiny bit, but am mostly better. :)
7. I am still sleeping too much. I have one productive week where I work three or four 8 hour days in a week, then get tired from all that effort and basically am useless and sleep through the whole next week. Then I feel guilty and make myself work three-to-four 8 hour days again, and the cycle continues. I can't seem to regulate it, and feel terribly behind on all my work all the time.
8. My friends are back but I've now gotten used to being alone and independent and I don't even want to see anyone. Definitely therapy time.