Espending

$1 parking for annual physical Friday
$8 parking Saturday at school for field trip
$9.10 picked up Thai food for BF on Friday
$5.38 on gift card at Long's for card for BF and I's anniversary
$17.65 for snacks for BF on Thursday, b/c he was studying for exam
$140 TOOL tix for BF for anniversary
$20 for 4 movie rentals for anniversary Saturday


Most of my expenses the past few days have been for BF and the celebration of our first year together, I notice. I just hate making a big deal out of some of those things--they are just things I DO because I love him. Picking up and paying for the Thai food, for example--I was already out, it's on my way home, and he was at home. Picking up snacks for him because he's studying for his big exam and I'm on my way home from work anyway. Things like that. It seems dumb to come home and present him with a receipt to be reimbursed for, like we do at work. He hates details, and especially money details, it seems. I pay all the bills and keep track of how much he owes me on a spreadsheet. When I mention that he owes me money, he gets moody and belligerent--"why don't you just let me pay the bills?" he asks. Because he doesn't CARE. He'd get mad every time he'd have the hassle of paying them. That's why. It's for my own peace of mind AND it's for him, too.

The last time I presented him with the amount he owed me after a few months, instead of writing me a check for the amount (as calculated in rent money, he just paid more one month), he rounded off the amount to the nearest thousand and gave me that. So I ended up having to owe him money after that. We've now crossed into he owes me money again, and he got mad again when I mentioned it. It's wierd, because we have discussions where he is psyched that he doesn't have to deal with the bills, and loves that I love it, and then when he owes me $$, he freaks. We have to change our strategy, what we're doing isn't working.

The problem is, I think he gets mad at details, such as keeping track of the pennies. But I don't know how else to split the bills fairly--one of us is going to pay alot more if we use the 'you pay for this, this, and this, and I'll pay for this and that' method.

Cable/internet: $120 to $135
sewer: $40
electric: $25 to $40 (towards low end now that we're in winter and don't have to use A/C)
gas: $15-$20

There's really no fair way to split it up so we're even, which I care about even if he doesn't. If I pay more, I (and my budget) will be painfully aware of it. If he pays more, I will not be paying my share. What to do??

At my old house, I paid the bills and just left the bill on the counter with the amount they each owed me on the counter. They'd write me checks for the amount, and all was well. It worked beautifully. I doubt this would work here.

Our landlord likes to receive one check instead of a check from both of us for the rent, so we switch off paying it each month. It's a hassle, since she doesn't cash it until the end of the month, so I end up having to mentally subtract a large amount from my bank balance to figure out how much money I REALLY have in there. That's a method that works, maybe we should just switch off everything?? That seems like a plan that I could be ok with (even though different months will have different amounts, it shouldn't vary by TOO much). However, I don't know if I can handle someone else having full reign over making sure the bills get paid.

So I don't know what to do. I trust him, so I should do this. I know I'm a control freak, but I like knowing that the electricity isn't going to be cut off 'cause I paid the bill myself.